Well funny how funny is not funny and there's just no way to win a battle without showing your angry emoji, right! I don't care if anyone thinks my thoughts are ridiculous because trust me I know I am not entertaining shit that isn't basically in full on attack of the human race. I don't care if this gets blown off as insanity. I don't care if I get called crazy...look crazy or get threatened by the enemy to be locked away forever in the battle only in my head.
The state of the world is in undertow and I am awake to the forces...that mock my every thought, breath and zap my energy. Laugh as you will...I don't believe I am hearing "echoes." I do however believe I am locking down on some very nasty and perpetuating darkness of generational curses.
And what brought this on is really thinking about how much they lie to me. If you think it's creepy, try living it. Anyway I was thinking how the enemy tried to put in my head that Adam was a sex trafficking blah blah blah don't even want to say it again! Seriously fukers cause I want to say about that is at least he "trafficked" me in the right direction! Damn he really did. I know his affection was healing to me and I will keep that stance, and honor it. So have always had a pirate room for him as a little boy in my dollhouse. And I protected the shit out of that room...and he does have a seashell. And I do believe he hears too. And a map of the US...a picture of his heritage. Tons a pirate stuff! Cause he's a scalliwag lol!
So really I've come to terms that I can love some one...and they might be scared of me or hate me or discount everything I have ever stated as crazy. They really could even be evil...and all fukt up inside...trippin...angry wanting me put away. And yesterday I took the lust out of my feelings for him. And bam there was still love for him. And if people in this century want to call me sick for how my heart was built...I've gotten to a point where have just told all the shit to just fukn bring it. Because I am getting threatened with all sort of insedious bullshit.
And I have faith that it is not to destroy me because I have seen the other side of all this. And I so want to fight this for the first time in my life with every ounce of my energy and I am getting it to an excruciating level that I know it's all gonna be worth it. And if it's not and I fail then at least I know I tried with all that was in me.
Because that's what I believe...that my God would not put me through this tumultuous, insane, confusing life if there was no end and no relief...never any promises of what it means to be a good person? A human ? I know what love is now and that can never be stolen from me.
And I for anyone in this world of Flatt doesn't see or believe in spiritual warfare...hot damn I've never in my life fought so hard in like a week and if this is what schitzophrenics go through all their life and get told its a chemical imbalance?
Why freaky freaky fuk do they accept that as an answer?
Yeah I need more therapy and more meds...yeah I need all the systems established to fight a spiritual war. And funny I need money? I am gonna say the "paper" I've been promised is being saved up for me in God's Kingdom. It's biblical. Just saying
And that's what I believe about my life. Just been through way to much...to sit back and watch and the harder you fight the harder they fight...and sometimes I think I don't matter at all to this world...and then I am like why would I be so absolutely attacked without reprieve, if I was no matter? This is terrible and my heart really goes out to anyone who fight this cause it's horrid.
And just living through it makes everyone of you a warrior! Stake it and claim it!
The state of the world is in undertow and I am awake to the forces...that mock my every thought, breath and zap my energy. Laugh as you will...I don't believe I am hearing "echoes." I do however believe I am locking down on some very nasty and perpetuating darkness of generational curses.
And what brought this on is really thinking about how much they lie to me. If you think it's creepy, try living it. Anyway I was thinking how the enemy tried to put in my head that Adam was a sex trafficking blah blah blah don't even want to say it again! Seriously fukers cause I want to say about that is at least he "trafficked" me in the right direction! Damn he really did. I know his affection was healing to me and I will keep that stance, and honor it. So have always had a pirate room for him as a little boy in my dollhouse. And I protected the shit out of that room...and he does have a seashell. And I do believe he hears too. And a map of the US...a picture of his heritage. Tons a pirate stuff! Cause he's a scalliwag lol!
So really I've come to terms that I can love some one...and they might be scared of me or hate me or discount everything I have ever stated as crazy. They really could even be evil...and all fukt up inside...trippin...angry wanting me put away. And yesterday I took the lust out of my feelings for him. And bam there was still love for him. And if people in this century want to call me sick for how my heart was built...I've gotten to a point where have just told all the shit to just fukn bring it. Because I am getting threatened with all sort of insedious bullshit.
And I have faith that it is not to destroy me because I have seen the other side of all this. And I so want to fight this for the first time in my life with every ounce of my energy and I am getting it to an excruciating level that I know it's all gonna be worth it. And if it's not and I fail then at least I know I tried with all that was in me.
Because that's what I believe...that my God would not put me through this tumultuous, insane, confusing life if there was no end and no relief...never any promises of what it means to be a good person? A human ? I know what love is now and that can never be stolen from me.
And I for anyone in this world of Flatt doesn't see or believe in spiritual warfare...hot damn I've never in my life fought so hard in like a week and if this is what schitzophrenics go through all their life and get told its a chemical imbalance?
Why freaky freaky fuk do they accept that as an answer?
Yeah I need more therapy and more meds...yeah I need all the systems established to fight a spiritual war. And funny I need money? I am gonna say the "paper" I've been promised is being saved up for me in God's Kingdom. It's biblical. Just saying
And that's what I believe about my life. Just been through way to much...to sit back and watch and the harder you fight the harder they fight...and sometimes I think I don't matter at all to this world...and then I am like why would I be so absolutely attacked without reprieve, if I was no matter? This is terrible and my heart really goes out to anyone who fight this cause it's horrid.
And just living through it makes everyone of you a warrior! Stake it and claim it!
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