Day two sans antipsychotic and still feel much clearer and my friend said much better to be around. I can breath and I think my blood pressure is at a good level...and not angry! It doesn't feel like the world is against me. I did take a three hour nap and I do have a headache. But the withdrawal symptoms said they could be more aggressive and flu like so I will take the nap and a headache!
Pretty laid back day. Made some calls about bills went to two meetings and checked out a book titled "Soulmates." It was at the Wellbriety meeting and I thought what the heck go home and tear into that sucker and see if anything they say matches my psychosis. Nope took a nap.
At the meeting tonight I saw a Raven curly haired young man...he reminds me of Adam very much except his curly hair is Adam's hair on steroids. I kept looking at him and he was looking back prolly like "what?" I was thinking "yes he will do quite nicely" etc. Etc. I was being a vixen type or a cougar or a vamp in that moment with the "sensative" type look he had. Yep he was going down lol.
And then my psychosis said no it's a trick! Damn ruins everything and then I look down and he had a ring on. Oh well so much for me being a vampress-cougar-vixen type. So I go outside til the end of the meeting there were a bazillion people there. And of course I have to say to this guy after that had he been catching me looking at him was because he reminded me of someone who had similar hair (and I liked the way it fell over his face...um) no I didn't say that part!!! He was nice and said his hair was hard to take care of...anyway. It made me think how long it has been since I have seen Adam and how I could almost like see him in this other dude.
Ah well...that's not all that exciting for being off meds now is it? Napping and cougaring and then running away lol..and it would be wrong just to be into someone that looked like Adam...because they wouldnt "Be Adam". So that's like a knife in my skull...but anywho think I am just writing cause that's what I do and there was really not a whole lot interesting happening today!
Thanks for reading anyway! Toodles!
Pretty laid back day. Made some calls about bills went to two meetings and checked out a book titled "Soulmates." It was at the Wellbriety meeting and I thought what the heck go home and tear into that sucker and see if anything they say matches my psychosis. Nope took a nap.
At the meeting tonight I saw a Raven curly haired young man...he reminds me of Adam very much except his curly hair is Adam's hair on steroids. I kept looking at him and he was looking back prolly like "what?" I was thinking "yes he will do quite nicely" etc. Etc. I was being a vixen type or a cougar or a vamp in that moment with the "sensative" type look he had. Yep he was going down lol.
And then my psychosis said no it's a trick! Damn ruins everything and then I look down and he had a ring on. Oh well so much for me being a vampress-cougar-vixen type. So I go outside til the end of the meeting there were a bazillion people there. And of course I have to say to this guy after that had he been catching me looking at him was because he reminded me of someone who had similar hair (and I liked the way it fell over his face...um) no I didn't say that part!!! He was nice and said his hair was hard to take care of...anyway. It made me think how long it has been since I have seen Adam and how I could almost like see him in this other dude.
Ah well...that's not all that exciting for being off meds now is it? Napping and cougaring and then running away lol..and it would be wrong just to be into someone that looked like Adam...because they wouldnt "Be Adam". So that's like a knife in my skull...but anywho think I am just writing cause that's what I do and there was really not a whole lot interesting happening today!
Thanks for reading anyway! Toodles!
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