I Care

I guess I should have seen you by the side of the road...should have remembered your walk.  Didn't even notice as Nick said we just past Adam up by Lake Elmo on a stormy night.  I don't know if I believe him, he lies a lot...and you are a ghost to me anyhow.  I'm working something out here...on and on.  For a purpose other than to ramble on...I live in two worlds...and the one where I am a poor crazy disabled person gets old. I get pretty famous sometimes...so I know I would like it.  I really do think we are both famous in another realm.  I can see it just enough to make sense to myself.

I think 3 people have read my book.  Its a lot to read.  I didn't write it for everybody I wrote it for you.  Its beyond insanity I know.  And it takes a lot of reading to get to the good part, where I get taken off too heaven by you.  Very assured that its kooky.  Still the best thing I have ever done with my life is write.

I hear bad things about you, that you are using.  Makes me so sad. You were so against that, so I don't understand why? Must be a gaping hole in you...and I think that is where I fit...somewhere in there is me.  If I can hear eternity talking to me off and on for 20 years...I am pretty sure I am not wrong.

Its painful the way it is.  In my second book I make drugs and crime actually be a front to God's Kingdom.  That it is all a ploy to bring about the end of the world.  I turn the death and destruction into serving a purpose.  I've got to hope and trust that it serves a purpose with you.

Just ultimately I care.




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