Help me! Help me! I am melting...OH what a world. Something I have been working on grass roots for about three years on different committees with no paycheck whatsoever is peer mentoring. I am certified by Montana Peer Network.,,and in October services of a Peer Mentor will be paid out by medicaid. If I hadn't gotten sick this would be so dialed in by now.
So far two of my friends in sobriety that have dual diagnosis that said they wanted to help, have now said they have too much going on, or want to find their own passion. I guess this is my project based on my experience strength hope, and what I felt was lacking for me in the recovery process. Peer mentoring is gonna bridge the gap between professionals and the served people. Its huge asset to reform and the possibilities of a more recovery minded community. Below is the requirements for a peer mentor. This would be the training for a peer mentor at Black Ink.
And I guess I know why people don't take me seriously, is because I am so honest about what I go through, Well that was ConCord and now I am in Flatt and I mean business. And like seriously not looking to die in all this,,,just getting so fukn burnt out on closed doors. I so wish I knew how to navigate this dream. But it is messing with my serenity because every plan I have made in past five years hasn't happened for me. And I just fear that means I should stop putting effort into anything...and just give up and head back to my bar stool. And me giving up prolly means death.
"Hey that's a good idea Miranda...you go for it." And its like ok? I can't do it alone?
Or maybe I can? Who knows that God that I won't deny is helping me more than I think. Day 16 I think!
So far two of my friends in sobriety that have dual diagnosis that said they wanted to help, have now said they have too much going on, or want to find their own passion. I guess this is my project based on my experience strength hope, and what I felt was lacking for me in the recovery process. Peer mentoring is gonna bridge the gap between professionals and the served people. Its huge asset to reform and the possibilities of a more recovery minded community. Below is the requirements for a peer mentor. This would be the training for a peer mentor at Black Ink.
Peer
Support Services Curriculum Checklist – taken from Montana Medicaid
at MT.GOv
Agency
orientation;
Recovery
process including principles, premises, components, scope, types,
context, framework
and
recovery identity;
Role
of Peer Support;
Ethics
and Boundaries (includes HIPAA, confidentiality, mandatory rep
orting,
duty to warn);
Peer
Supporter Code of Ethics;
Self
disclosure;
Cultural
awareness;
Stress,
burnout, and self-care;
Working
with clients, conflict resolution, safety;
Wellness
recovery planning;
Pathways
of recovery;
Trauma
informed care/ grief;
Suicide
awareness;
Evidence
based practices specific to the population the peer supporter works
with
Emotional
intelligence;
Stages
of change;
Accessing
resources
(includes
community resources, benefits, and services)
One
of the following specific to the population a peer supporter is
working with:
Addictions
101
Disability
101
plus
training specific to the type of disability
Mental
health 101
Engaging
natural supports
*********************************************************************************************
So why am I alone in this proposal? This information from Medicaid requirements is in my plan. Should I just accept that people think I can't do shit in the real world because of my illness? All I know is I have been working on it for three years and talking talking talking about changes and then I come up with a pretty good idea and I just get ignored...mainly because I don't have the right connections or reputation I used to. I was invited to all kinds of community meetings when I was a VISTA. Its so strange to me how reputations can crumble to pieces and they abandon you like they never knew you or your heart in the first place.
One suggestion on my Dual Recovery concepts was to leave God out of it completely and never talk about a Higher Power. Yeah fuk that, right! I believe in God a universal God that loves every soul and I would take a bullet before I would deny my faith.
Another suggestion was I should just copy some other dual groups program or steps. Changing a few words from the main program wasn't impacting me, Not what I want. Damn this is gonna be alot more work than I ever expected. just to get a dual group started.
But this service to the community is what is driving me, its service work for me. And I am learning how people get treated in a way I never understood before, and it feels me with passion for helping them, I think most people by my point of rejection of every angle would just be fukn out! And not seriously invested in a culture of recovery and change, And I also think I have a satanic force working against me pinning me down. And its about to quarter horse me. You know how they ripped peoples limbs of by horses running in all directions? Yep that's exactly what this is all like. Ripping off of limbs sounds better than how I am treated.
I have one person invested in helping me. A few other casual "maybes" and everyone that hears my plan says its great and needed,,,now Little Red Hen is eating her own damn bread pretty much alone. I don't get it. I don't get how far one can fall in reputation, while their character never changed? I guess that's just how mentally ill people are treated? I am scum sucking bottom feeder freak I guess. Well I love all you scum sucking bottom feeders...Let's rock some evolution-revolution!
And I guess I know why people don't take me seriously, is because I am so honest about what I go through, Well that was ConCord and now I am in Flatt and I mean business. And like seriously not looking to die in all this,,,just getting so fukn burnt out on closed doors. I so wish I knew how to navigate this dream. But it is messing with my serenity because every plan I have made in past five years hasn't happened for me. And I just fear that means I should stop putting effort into anything...and just give up and head back to my bar stool. And me giving up prolly means death.
Or maybe I can? Who knows that God that I won't deny is helping me more than I think. Day 16 I think!
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