Long story short I really put myself in danger when I am psychotic. On the day I got dropped off at Beyond the Cup and was looking for Dead Jake all over town I asked strangers for a ride home. This is the day that was like a scavenger hunt for me and I was sometimes barefoot and went everywhere including St. Vincent's and walked by some police who just asked me my Superhero name.Billings Wanderlust explains that day more. I had walked quite a bit and there was a storm coming and I wanted to get home...it was cold in my tank top and I was defeated from not finding Jake. Yes, you can have more than one soul mate and these past couple times I just knew he was alive! So I walked into Discontent and proudly put on a pot sweatshirt and posed for a pic. I don't like the effect of marijuana on me, but I still am all about it being legal! Its from God! Make some damn money off of it...tax it and utilize it! Quit filling our system and making offenders out of pot smokers...just saying!
I believe the day right after that was my Garden of Eden experience, and so I was hospitalized. The Garden I was hospitalized the week before that but they let me out because of a three day policy on Medicaid....so off to my adventures I was. I had a roommate in psych that needed a place to stay, so who is so gracious than to say you can stay with me? She turned out to be just fine and nice but was a drug addict.
So that day I had asked for a ride home from a black man and who I thought was his girlfriend, who came into Discontent. They had a trashed out car and I thought were on the same type of get to heaven get rich plan as I had. Everything connected and they were rolling with a black lighter. I was obsessed with the connections I saw with black lighters and would trade people for them. Must of had 20 in a week. So I said I would give them a $20 when we got to my place. I let them come up. My house was impeccable and I had created a "store" of available items which I gave people for free. So they ended up with $20 bucks which had been hidden in my dollhouse for "prosperity" and a brand new art set of my kids. I was so upbeat and energized they must have thought I was on something...because it wasn't the last time I saw this man.
After I got out of the hospital I still had no car. Tish (the roommate) and I were sitting in the living room when the doorbell rang. I didn't recognize the man. He looked very scary to me all thugged out. If Tish hadn't been here I would have asked him to leave and called the cops. I didn't like that he was there, but I didn't want to be mean or racist about his appearance so I let him in. Shortly thereafter he whips out some drugs. I was scared and said nope not me, I don't need them. He put them away. Tish was completely comfortable and so I tried to be cool, but I was not.
Then he says "want to see some jewelry?" So I am like not into this at all because its a bunch of stolen shit from Hobby Lobby and no he didn't steal it, but he was paid with it. I didn't touch it. So at this point Tish is into it and picks out a charm and I am growing more and more uncomfortable with the situation. I say this is not the world I live in, I am not into drugs and I need you to go. I don't like being mean to people, but I had to! I made it very clear his lifestyle was not what I wanted in my house...and that no I wasn't on anything the day I asked for a ride. And that in no way was I interested in pursuing the lifestyle he was bragging about. Just not fukn interested right? Meth actually is boring compared to what I get from God, so why would I even mess with that disgusting world? I guess who I thought was his girlfriend was really just a bag ho or whatever you call it...nope would never want to put myself in that arena. And I literally have no reason to.
It was awkward as hell for me. But I straight up in the nicest way I possibly could explain myself, told him to get the fuk out. Not my world. You're not welcome to try and fuk with mine.
That was in May. My doorbell rang at one am last night. Mitchell came and woke me up. It was him. We didn't answer it. He rang it three times and stood there for what seemed like a long time. I do not understand his gumption unless it is to harm me, or he somehow thinks he is gonna get me interested in meth? I've tried it before and I don't understand what everybody is so up in arms about? Thieving and lying and hustling and being junkies? Its totally marketed to the poor. I also had a prescription for pain pills for my back, and they did nothing for me either. And people do all sorts of shit to get at that too. So maybe I am lucky that I have a "fun brain" and don't ever even think I need any sort of "enhancement" for it. My trips are better than acid or so I hear. Wish I could sell it in pill form! Make lots of money!
In the mean time if I don't get murdered and no I don't recall his name...its a nickname stupid like U-Turn or some shit...but in the meantime mental illness is gonna be the new hip thing. I am really starting to hate the stereotypes and stigma about it...so if I said I do all sorts of drugs to get this way and oooh you saw shadow people? Big fukn whoop on the shadow people...and besides I don't even see evil anymore, its all just light and beauty! Meth is the devil's drug, not necessary to me in any way...so stay away from me scary thug man from Chicago! There some more information.
I believe the day right after that was my Garden of Eden experience, and so I was hospitalized. The Garden I was hospitalized the week before that but they let me out because of a three day policy on Medicaid....so off to my adventures I was. I had a roommate in psych that needed a place to stay, so who is so gracious than to say you can stay with me? She turned out to be just fine and nice but was a drug addict.
So that day I had asked for a ride home from a black man and who I thought was his girlfriend, who came into Discontent. They had a trashed out car and I thought were on the same type of get to heaven get rich plan as I had. Everything connected and they were rolling with a black lighter. I was obsessed with the connections I saw with black lighters and would trade people for them. Must of had 20 in a week. So I said I would give them a $20 when we got to my place. I let them come up. My house was impeccable and I had created a "store" of available items which I gave people for free. So they ended up with $20 bucks which had been hidden in my dollhouse for "prosperity" and a brand new art set of my kids. I was so upbeat and energized they must have thought I was on something...because it wasn't the last time I saw this man.
After I got out of the hospital I still had no car. Tish (the roommate) and I were sitting in the living room when the doorbell rang. I didn't recognize the man. He looked very scary to me all thugged out. If Tish hadn't been here I would have asked him to leave and called the cops. I didn't like that he was there, but I didn't want to be mean or racist about his appearance so I let him in. Shortly thereafter he whips out some drugs. I was scared and said nope not me, I don't need them. He put them away. Tish was completely comfortable and so I tried to be cool, but I was not.
Then he says "want to see some jewelry?" So I am like not into this at all because its a bunch of stolen shit from Hobby Lobby and no he didn't steal it, but he was paid with it. I didn't touch it. So at this point Tish is into it and picks out a charm and I am growing more and more uncomfortable with the situation. I say this is not the world I live in, I am not into drugs and I need you to go. I don't like being mean to people, but I had to! I made it very clear his lifestyle was not what I wanted in my house...and that no I wasn't on anything the day I asked for a ride. And that in no way was I interested in pursuing the lifestyle he was bragging about. Just not fukn interested right? Meth actually is boring compared to what I get from God, so why would I even mess with that disgusting world? I guess who I thought was his girlfriend was really just a bag ho or whatever you call it...nope would never want to put myself in that arena. And I literally have no reason to.
It was awkward as hell for me. But I straight up in the nicest way I possibly could explain myself, told him to get the fuk out. Not my world. You're not welcome to try and fuk with mine.
That was in May. My doorbell rang at one am last night. Mitchell came and woke me up. It was him. We didn't answer it. He rang it three times and stood there for what seemed like a long time. I do not understand his gumption unless it is to harm me, or he somehow thinks he is gonna get me interested in meth? I've tried it before and I don't understand what everybody is so up in arms about? Thieving and lying and hustling and being junkies? Its totally marketed to the poor. I also had a prescription for pain pills for my back, and they did nothing for me either. And people do all sorts of shit to get at that too. So maybe I am lucky that I have a "fun brain" and don't ever even think I need any sort of "enhancement" for it. My trips are better than acid or so I hear. Wish I could sell it in pill form! Make lots of money!
In the mean time if I don't get murdered and no I don't recall his name...its a nickname stupid like U-Turn or some shit...but in the meantime mental illness is gonna be the new hip thing. I am really starting to hate the stereotypes and stigma about it...so if I said I do all sorts of drugs to get this way and oooh you saw shadow people? Big fukn whoop on the shadow people...and besides I don't even see evil anymore, its all just light and beauty! Meth is the devil's drug, not necessary to me in any way...so stay away from me scary thug man from Chicago! There some more information.
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