So when my car was stolen they took off my pink turtle sticker. I decided I was gonna get a Fox sticker you know for Raposa so I went out to Scheels...they didn't have one. So then I thought of just a real fox and went to Go to Discontent kinda hippie shop. On the way there I thought a beer sounded so good and wouldn't it just be nice to relax after all I have been through? I had forty bucks in my wallet and I will get to the later...so there I am driving towards downtown and just dreaming about beer...flirt a little and get some more. Anyway I drove down Montana Avenue and right when I passed the Rainbow bar the thought of it made me vomit a little in mouth. So that's good because me going to bar by myself right now is probably the stupidest and most insane thing I would have ever done. And we recoil as if a hot flame. Good. Very good went to a meeting and here I am sober to tell about it. Good strong choice...because even though I wanted to be weak and just let myself fall apart I did not.
I had money because someone is helping me. He paid for my cat SheRah to get a vet visit antibiotic shot. She's been fighting...and getting roughed up. Next thing I know he is moving in with me. Not what I want or need right now...and I hate that I am in this situation after six years living by myself and making it. I told him I like my space and if he tries hitting on I will kick him out without a discussion. I am zero percent attracted to him and in fact just don't find men attractive at all anymore. Guess I am specific in my quest lol. I'm not thrilled about the idea at all...it's a horrible idea. But these are hard times and I just got to suck it up and share my space...and hope he doesn't get drunk. Yes fresh out of treatment but I have known him about a year. No car. Yea this is the worst plan ever but I have already said ok and taken some money from him.
I guess I have stated that it is not good for me to live alone...but I was thinking more like a college psych major or something! I hate my desperation right now...this financial situation is not what I spent seven years in college for! But even as I came home from the meeting tonight I decided that my life is pretty damn exciting...way more than any fricken beer! Such an adventure...I'm like a damn Hobbit on Lord of The Rings! My life adventure rivals Middle Fukn Earth lol! Seriously I should not complain about material wants, ya know?
So some dude that is not Adam is gonna sleep on the bunk beds...maybe that is why I am really so pissy about it truth be told. Can I say proving someone is your soul mate and you love them is really hard to do in today's society. And what's even worse is that I think I have proven it and it doesn't matter anyway. I am a big fricken weirdo to say 20 years of trips out of reality led me to that conclusion...well I am like Star Trek ...I boldly go where no woman has gone before!!!
And it matters for shit and I am a 38 year old beautiful woman that's getting a roommate...yay for all the 38 year old women with roommates let's applaud our effort in the least! Ok bitch mode is turning on...I better go night night! And applaud me for not being at the Rainbow Bar right now trying to flirt my way into a blackout ...yes I am proud I didn't check out that way tonight, no not tonight!
I had money because someone is helping me. He paid for my cat SheRah to get a vet visit antibiotic shot. She's been fighting...and getting roughed up. Next thing I know he is moving in with me. Not what I want or need right now...and I hate that I am in this situation after six years living by myself and making it. I told him I like my space and if he tries hitting on I will kick him out without a discussion. I am zero percent attracted to him and in fact just don't find men attractive at all anymore. Guess I am specific in my quest lol. I'm not thrilled about the idea at all...it's a horrible idea. But these are hard times and I just got to suck it up and share my space...and hope he doesn't get drunk. Yes fresh out of treatment but I have known him about a year. No car. Yea this is the worst plan ever but I have already said ok and taken some money from him.
I guess I have stated that it is not good for me to live alone...but I was thinking more like a college psych major or something! I hate my desperation right now...this financial situation is not what I spent seven years in college for! But even as I came home from the meeting tonight I decided that my life is pretty damn exciting...way more than any fricken beer! Such an adventure...I'm like a damn Hobbit on Lord of The Rings! My life adventure rivals Middle Fukn Earth lol! Seriously I should not complain about material wants, ya know?
So some dude that is not Adam is gonna sleep on the bunk beds...maybe that is why I am really so pissy about it truth be told. Can I say proving someone is your soul mate and you love them is really hard to do in today's society. And what's even worse is that I think I have proven it and it doesn't matter anyway. I am a big fricken weirdo to say 20 years of trips out of reality led me to that conclusion...well I am like Star Trek ...I boldly go where no woman has gone before!!!
And it matters for shit and I am a 38 year old beautiful woman that's getting a roommate...yay for all the 38 year old women with roommates let's applaud our effort in the least! Ok bitch mode is turning on...I better go night night! And applaud me for not being at the Rainbow Bar right now trying to flirt my way into a blackout ...yes I am proud I didn't check out that way tonight, no not tonight!
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