Dreaming I couldn't catch up with how many things were being turned to snakes while trying to get back to home. It was like a game and the weird thing is I don't remember all of it but I just fought it for hours in my sleep and finally won. Something to the effect is keep my feet gentle on the speed limit of 25 and all will get home safely. We beat all the snakes being thrown our way.
I have always fought heaven and hell. Since eighteen...and maybe I think all my life as if I can break it into good and bad scenes. Intakes and out takes. I am hearing people yell at me right now...chemical imbalance? Lie. Even today my best friend tried leading me into an argument about the nature of my "illness???" She is quite opinionated and her father is like me and she formed a strong attitude against it being the spiritual realm I can hear. And oh so much has the world done this...to the point even my mom fights me on a "chemical imbalance" theory. Odd as fuk she wouldn't buy into my gift. She says how can I be so spiritually gifted if I am not pure sexually??? How could a sinner be a prophet? The oddest f-n things for my very own Christian mother to speak at me. I defy pretty much every opinion about me to continue my path. Not in my own strength.
I just prayed to my mind to silence the voices so I could write this in Jesus name and they left. Power in the name of Jesus. I believe we have all in one life at least believed in all religions. Been all races. And my dream tonight led me to believe that I really am binding and loosing into the heavenly realm. I believe even my writing has to be erasable. I believe we are going there soon. At least in my town everything is in chaos. Most my friends are cray. They are literally letting people out of our jail right now on OR...like many, many???
So I am like how the hell have I gotten so strong? I used to shatter like a pretty china doll but never hurt as a drunk. Fill in the cracks with beer glue. In the letter my old therapist wrote to Adam she said "yes Adam I think you are helping Miranda..." Yes. Indeed. I have an inner core only God can give from trials and tribulation felt. Endured. And I am enamored with it all.
My dream tonight was so powerful and mostly all I remember was I won by replacing things in a sequence. So I bind it and loose it. Write it BLACK INK. Erase it, replace it...remove it, forgive it and let go. Black Ink pens and black lighters. I must have had 20 different peoples black lighters in my hands in the last month. Trading. Trading up. Trading my welfare life for a correct measure ruler. I think that's why I threw all my credit/debit cards and food stamps into an alley. Fuk it I am trying to change the world anyhow.
I hope I am weird enough. Lol. Good night!
I have always fought heaven and hell. Since eighteen...and maybe I think all my life as if I can break it into good and bad scenes. Intakes and out takes. I am hearing people yell at me right now...chemical imbalance? Lie. Even today my best friend tried leading me into an argument about the nature of my "illness???" She is quite opinionated and her father is like me and she formed a strong attitude against it being the spiritual realm I can hear. And oh so much has the world done this...to the point even my mom fights me on a "chemical imbalance" theory. Odd as fuk she wouldn't buy into my gift. She says how can I be so spiritually gifted if I am not pure sexually??? How could a sinner be a prophet? The oddest f-n things for my very own Christian mother to speak at me. I defy pretty much every opinion about me to continue my path. Not in my own strength.
I just prayed to my mind to silence the voices so I could write this in Jesus name and they left. Power in the name of Jesus. I believe we have all in one life at least believed in all religions. Been all races. And my dream tonight led me to believe that I really am binding and loosing into the heavenly realm. I believe even my writing has to be erasable. I believe we are going there soon. At least in my town everything is in chaos. Most my friends are cray. They are literally letting people out of our jail right now on OR...like many, many???
So I am like how the hell have I gotten so strong? I used to shatter like a pretty china doll but never hurt as a drunk. Fill in the cracks with beer glue. In the letter my old therapist wrote to Adam she said "yes Adam I think you are helping Miranda..." Yes. Indeed. I have an inner core only God can give from trials and tribulation felt. Endured. And I am enamored with it all.
My dream tonight was so powerful and mostly all I remember was I won by replacing things in a sequence. So I bind it and loose it. Write it BLACK INK. Erase it, replace it...remove it, forgive it and let go. Black Ink pens and black lighters. I must have had 20 different peoples black lighters in my hands in the last month. Trading. Trading up. Trading my welfare life for a correct measure ruler. I think that's why I threw all my credit/debit cards and food stamps into an alley. Fuk it I am trying to change the world anyhow.
I hope I am weird enough. Lol. Good night!
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