So I was an "us" for the City of Billings Community Development for two years. I worked on committees to impact the poor, homeless and mentally ill in our city. I did a good job too. Felt very admired for my efforts and got to know all the "good deed doers" in the Magic City.
I remember hugging a homeless Native American that I had gotten to know. He impacted me and he was crying so I hugged him. I saw two white women staring at me in shock driving by. Its a huge issue in our area. The "us" versus "them." Maybe it is everywhere? Maybe that's why nobody ever solves problems they just sit with the "us" people and discuss all the "thems." I know "us" tries because like I've said I have been "us." AND there are lots of good intentions. But it is still THE GREAT DIVIDE.
But then I became "them." A felon. And for whatever reason who I was before was forgotten...and I was just an alcoholic psycho felon. I was close to the Director of our local library...he really was like the dad and mentor I had never had. He used to come to my kid's birthday parties. When I went to jail the first time I called him and tried to explain that I had a mental illness...like I have said its hard for people to understand. I can't think of one person that I knew then from my city work that has really kept in touch and that is painful. I reach out...but no one ever checks on me. I know it is because they just don't "get it." I used to be a hot commodity as far as job prospects with a great resume, and now I can't even get interviews. Its the operation of it all clear as day to me!!! US AND THEM
I guess that is why I am blessed. Because I know exactly what "them" feels like. But I can also be an "us" because I come out of it every time. Not everybody gets that chance. Some people will never be heard...and I guess that's why God gave me my writing business. And a pretty interesting scenario of hell that I have been through for texting while ill.
I would would really like to see a "WE" mentality when approaching systems. It all needs an overhaul. Its a disaster...and bandaids won't help anymore.
I remember hugging a homeless Native American that I had gotten to know. He impacted me and he was crying so I hugged him. I saw two white women staring at me in shock driving by. Its a huge issue in our area. The "us" versus "them." Maybe it is everywhere? Maybe that's why nobody ever solves problems they just sit with the "us" people and discuss all the "thems." I know "us" tries because like I've said I have been "us." AND there are lots of good intentions. But it is still THE GREAT DIVIDE.
But then I became "them." A felon. And for whatever reason who I was before was forgotten...and I was just an alcoholic psycho felon. I was close to the Director of our local library...he really was like the dad and mentor I had never had. He used to come to my kid's birthday parties. When I went to jail the first time I called him and tried to explain that I had a mental illness...like I have said its hard for people to understand. I can't think of one person that I knew then from my city work that has really kept in touch and that is painful. I reach out...but no one ever checks on me. I know it is because they just don't "get it." I used to be a hot commodity as far as job prospects with a great resume, and now I can't even get interviews. Its the operation of it all clear as day to me!!! US AND THEM
I guess that is why I am blessed. Because I know exactly what "them" feels like. But I can also be an "us" because I come out of it every time. Not everybody gets that chance. Some people will never be heard...and I guess that's why God gave me my writing business. And a pretty interesting scenario of hell that I have been through for texting while ill.
I would would really like to see a "WE" mentality when approaching systems. It all needs an overhaul. Its a disaster...and bandaids won't help anymore.
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