If I do treatment court for two years but don't graduate to their standards...does that mean I didn't recover? Didn't do it all correctly? I am really thinking that all the classes and rehab and all that shit "they" make money on doesn't change the fact that you are a felon. Will felons ever be recognized for turning their lives around? How hard do we have to make it for people in this country anyway? C'mon! Its ridiculous! I have a deferred sentence...but its still a label for me.
My ex husband is a brilliant entrepreneur and took business classes and he would take "all you all" to town, with the technicolor dreams he has inside him, and he gets pushed down at every attempt! We had some of the most amazing business visions together! He really is amazing! And a very serious felony offender. He wanted to go into the military 3 years after standing between his friend and a gun in a convenience store at 19. They wouldn't let him. He's my "Tom Cruise" with the flashy smile...He saved someones life, and he went to Las Vegas Prison for three years, an extremely difficult place to be at 19. And he was told if he ever offended again he would be considered a "violent offender." He offended for a small amount of Marijauna a few years later and his life was over!!! Legalize the shit already you idiot money makers!
Do you see why I love these men? Its heartbreaking and now our kids have two felons for parents!!! I was in trouble for a DUI in high school, but never til I fell in love! Everything I have ever done through all of this has been from love! Felons...Fairytales...and Redemption. "I LOVE RECOVERED FELONS!!!" Yeah that's a quote too. YEAH I would take that kind of man over any "suit and tie"...any day! Go ahead and send in your "recovered felony resume"...I am single. LOL.
Next thought. Sorry but the criminal thinking class which I was interested in learning about was the most ridiculous boring waste of time. A work book where you write your own answers and read them out loud...no discussion about your answers either. Didn't really learn anything except what other people's boundaries and morals are...I really wanted to learn how criminals think, thought it would take me for a psychological spin through that world, and nope. Stupid...expensive class.
So what are we doing here? What am I spinning my wheels for? Why do I give a fuk? Why do I think our system is deplorable? Why is my heart pounding for a bank robber? Because no one does anything about this shit...And I will write til I explode or go to jail...whichever works best! I have two little boys that tell me they love me no matter what! And they look up to me and they are proud of me! And so who wants to destroy their dreams like their parents? My ex would sell pretty rocks to the neighborhood as a little boy...how precious is that? He's always had dreams of a good life too! Yes I did too!!! And now my 9 year old son works in the neighborhood to afford things I can't afford! They have never got to do sports? Is that fair? I didn't either until sixth grade and am lucky I was a natural, but damn! And my son is begging me to do gymnastics this summer, and I have to fill out a form at the YMCA and show them what I get for food stamps, and still pay money I don't have??? What in the hell? This is not right!!! WHY ARE WE LIKE THIS???
The American dream is dead. Its a delusion and I learned this in Sociology 101 in 2002. But I didn't take it to heart working in radiology and getting my $70,000 education!!! Yes its a crap farce to make the lower and middle class work harder for the dolla bill. Its like .01% of people that somehow make it out of our systems that we all focus on! Keep up with the fukn Jones'. Yeah I've driven through Ironwood, and I drove through the southside...I was actually in a vehicle with the Community Development Director and a National Director of Housing and Urban Development - HUD!!! I showed her HIGH AND THE LOW. Yes, and now I am in public housing myself...irony.
Yes, its the "dream apartment" I always imagined as a welfare child. Yes the one that looks really pretty and is spacious so that I don't really realize I am poor! I think that's tactic. Its brand new, and I was excited at first, but then I thought about it more and what is the incentive for HUD to keep people like me housed? Whats the purpose behind making public housing look wealthy? There must be some bottom line somewhere! I burnt my counter top and the replacement for it was $1400. Who is putting so much money into my apartment and why? Just things I think about. It would probably go for $1400 in the regular market. The rent is $600 and I pay $186 with Section 8. All up in the government I am!!! Wasn't an actual plan...
So I was told today that because I am a felon, people will think I will reoffend...and just expect it from me for the rest of my life. Interesting. Interesting. Interesting. Because we have all these money making programs to "help people" and their always just always gonna be "felons" and not much more, unless they work a million times harder than the "suits." So why not just keep doing drugs and stealing? And figuring out ways to go to the pharmacies on every corner, and gambling in a million casinos in "Little Las Vegas." Whats the point?
Welcome to Billings!!!
I am preaching to the choir! LOL. Goodnight!
My ex husband is a brilliant entrepreneur and took business classes and he would take "all you all" to town, with the technicolor dreams he has inside him, and he gets pushed down at every attempt! We had some of the most amazing business visions together! He really is amazing! And a very serious felony offender. He wanted to go into the military 3 years after standing between his friend and a gun in a convenience store at 19. They wouldn't let him. He's my "Tom Cruise" with the flashy smile...He saved someones life, and he went to Las Vegas Prison for three years, an extremely difficult place to be at 19. And he was told if he ever offended again he would be considered a "violent offender." He offended for a small amount of Marijauna a few years later and his life was over!!! Legalize the shit already you idiot money makers!
Do you see why I love these men? Its heartbreaking and now our kids have two felons for parents!!! I was in trouble for a DUI in high school, but never til I fell in love! Everything I have ever done through all of this has been from love! Felons...Fairytales...and Redemption. "I LOVE RECOVERED FELONS!!!" Yeah that's a quote too. YEAH I would take that kind of man over any "suit and tie"...any day! Go ahead and send in your "recovered felony resume"...I am single. LOL.
Next thought. Sorry but the criminal thinking class which I was interested in learning about was the most ridiculous boring waste of time. A work book where you write your own answers and read them out loud...no discussion about your answers either. Didn't really learn anything except what other people's boundaries and morals are...I really wanted to learn how criminals think, thought it would take me for a psychological spin through that world, and nope. Stupid...expensive class.
So what are we doing here? What am I spinning my wheels for? Why do I give a fuk? Why do I think our system is deplorable? Why is my heart pounding for a bank robber? Because no one does anything about this shit...And I will write til I explode or go to jail...whichever works best! I have two little boys that tell me they love me no matter what! And they look up to me and they are proud of me! And so who wants to destroy their dreams like their parents? My ex would sell pretty rocks to the neighborhood as a little boy...how precious is that? He's always had dreams of a good life too! Yes I did too!!! And now my 9 year old son works in the neighborhood to afford things I can't afford! They have never got to do sports? Is that fair? I didn't either until sixth grade and am lucky I was a natural, but damn! And my son is begging me to do gymnastics this summer, and I have to fill out a form at the YMCA and show them what I get for food stamps, and still pay money I don't have??? What in the hell? This is not right!!! WHY ARE WE LIKE THIS???
The American dream is dead. Its a delusion and I learned this in Sociology 101 in 2002. But I didn't take it to heart working in radiology and getting my $70,000 education!!! Yes its a crap farce to make the lower and middle class work harder for the dolla bill. Its like .01% of people that somehow make it out of our systems that we all focus on! Keep up with the fukn Jones'. Yeah I've driven through Ironwood, and I drove through the southside...I was actually in a vehicle with the Community Development Director and a National Director of Housing and Urban Development - HUD!!! I showed her HIGH AND THE LOW. Yes, and now I am in public housing myself...irony.
Yes, its the "dream apartment" I always imagined as a welfare child. Yes the one that looks really pretty and is spacious so that I don't really realize I am poor! I think that's tactic. Its brand new, and I was excited at first, but then I thought about it more and what is the incentive for HUD to keep people like me housed? Whats the purpose behind making public housing look wealthy? There must be some bottom line somewhere! I burnt my counter top and the replacement for it was $1400. Who is putting so much money into my apartment and why? Just things I think about. It would probably go for $1400 in the regular market. The rent is $600 and I pay $186 with Section 8. All up in the government I am!!! Wasn't an actual plan...
So I was told today that because I am a felon, people will think I will reoffend...and just expect it from me for the rest of my life. Interesting. Interesting. Interesting. Because we have all these money making programs to "help people" and their always just always gonna be "felons" and not much more, unless they work a million times harder than the "suits." So why not just keep doing drugs and stealing? And figuring out ways to go to the pharmacies on every corner, and gambling in a million casinos in "Little Las Vegas." Whats the point?
Welcome to Billings!!!
I am preaching to the choir! LOL. Goodnight!
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