February 11th

February 11th 2013 was the last time Adam would talk to me.  He said he couldn't have me in his life because I was selling my pills. I said I would stop. I owed people money and I asked him to loan it to me so I would stop. I got one last fill the next day. I wonder if he would have said yes if all this would have happened? I'm glad it all happened though. It's kinda been a miracle to me.

February 11th 2014 I was drug from a jail cell right upon awakening. I thought I was leaving, but no they said you are going to court. They told me to shut up and not ask questions...I looked like shit. Now mind you my first time in a court room was the July before when Adam was granted a six month restraining order...I thought I was gonna be able to read a lengthy love letter lol!  Hmmm...I got two years to figure out a court room! Anyway on February 11th a year to the day he broke up with me, Adam asked for a lifetime restraining order. I cried out from the box "but I was in psychosis!" But it didn't matter he was super pissed...And I found out like a year later he had been dating my sponsors daughter at that time...No one would dare tell me lol! That was a super painful day for me. I do not know how one knows what they want for a lifetime? But he sure did.

I think it's weird that February 11th thing. It's in my book...And heaven and hell are in my book. You should just buy my book!  Amazon's got it for $15.99... Fairytale of a Felony Stalker by Eve Rising. I heard it's a cool book! Ah my first one!!!

It's totally crazy to think that was four years ago. February 11th came and went this year and I guess I am not superstitious because I don't even remember what happened that day??? In my book it was the 17th of each month which was my sobriety birthdays something was happening on... Always.

I'm getting scared how much I am writing about Adam lately. I need to chill on it.  For all I know he could still hate me and be plotting vengeance and he does have my balls pinned down pretty damn tight.  I think who does my writing hurt? Is my purpose to hurt? No it is not. I think I have a story worth telling of recovery and that I am gifted with writing. I hope that the fact that I still talk about the biggest life changing event of my life is ok?

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