There you go traipsing through my head; like a washed down pill, hard to swallow. Trying to find the precise prescription for walking away, while you run. It's not fair being crazy. It's not fair I've been set off like a volcanic eruption. All this spewing out of me...Mount Saint Miranda. Except I ain't no saint, I am a bit quirky, and but a forlorn shadow looking for the right words to say. Oozing complicated exploitations in some sort of survival flotation device, swirling on the big waves of emotion. My hope is that you know I am for you. I mean not like the "one" for you, but just that I am in your corner cheering a "go, fight, win!" There is something quite medeival about my spooky romance and my hair is growing long. In due time you'll be scaling the tower wall to me. But I guess that's part of my fiction, which is what keeps me going through the daily toil. The sweltering blush of a fairytale...but I hope you are ok. Not given the tiniest fraction of hope; and in fact the opposite. It's not fair being crazy. But I am for you. I never know what to say in person...I mean I wouldn't know if it happened, and we would just have to kiss. Just saying. Just saying I am still like a teenager with all of this mushy crap and never land attitude and let's get real people! I write fantasy fiction and I have one helluva hero. He's all made up! Just a concept...because I really don't know! And I don't want to think him mean and uncaring...that's not suitable for a hero, right? I'm leaving quite the legacy of imagination in my wake. No harm, I hope.
Truth is I am just very lonely and there is some kind of solace in said imagination. I am disconnected and there is no one on the line...or so my head tells me. Could have missed a hundred calls by now...but that's what mental illness is. You fight and fight to feel not alone and yet you do still. I guess my blog is a way that I can just be me and let people know what it is like. I put myself out there being brave, in hopes that others would too. I have almost 500 posts and have never seen a comment. Wouldn't that lift me up to be able to figure out how to read those? Or maybe there aren't any! I just don't know!
Anyhow this was suppose to be some "saucy" exciting writing...and it turns out I am just alone writing again. Poor me! Boo who! It's a legacy of sorts anyhow...I am for you...but now I need to be for me!
Truth is I am just very lonely and there is some kind of solace in said imagination. I am disconnected and there is no one on the line...or so my head tells me. Could have missed a hundred calls by now...but that's what mental illness is. You fight and fight to feel not alone and yet you do still. I guess my blog is a way that I can just be me and let people know what it is like. I put myself out there being brave, in hopes that others would too. I have almost 500 posts and have never seen a comment. Wouldn't that lift me up to be able to figure out how to read those? Or maybe there aren't any! I just don't know!
Anyhow this was suppose to be some "saucy" exciting writing...and it turns out I am just alone writing again. Poor me! Boo who! It's a legacy of sorts anyhow...I am for you...but now I need to be for me!