Of psychosis...of that frustrating craft I made for my mother at the age of seven. I distinctly remember that I meant to alternate my rainbow colors but the wrote all of "Mothers Day" in yellow! Well it's turned into a plate of memory on the wall in a four cornered room at my parents hospitality hanging directly over me saying "love Mandy" 1986...and just Hay and of course you can't read the part in yellow. And then I look right and see my sons faces in frames...and I recollect in my depression that yes I did love them, but the evil side says they were never mine to keep. And the lies. And the lies. And trying to figure it all out gets exhausting. I am here again trapped in my mind...and here is my outlet, which circles around my fear...psychosis is known as a circular insanity. God grant me freedom! Please and amen!!!