Thanks mom but I'm totally done with what it's like series of non-series.
We can save that shit for another platform hey?
I like my dippity dew dah...
Daisies coming up surrounding your cerebrum,
Cell selecting, crazy talking, walking round the pain and soaking,
Up the son shines!
Seriously who needs more pain? Not I?
Who needs more negativity?
If you're gonna suck...go suck somewhere else please!
And if those daisies trip you?
And if your knoggin doesn't want to jive with me?
Is a'ight darlin! Doesn't make you wrong or make me right.
If you can't really relate, why don't we go on a date?
I know I can make you laugh put a smile on your face!
Like sorry mom I don't want to deliberately talk about my pain!
And if you get real real, about what it's like in the society to be a disabled mental person…
If I went there and made my blog about that pain… Yeah it would suck.
So some other day I can write a book about the pain side of this life.
The fear and confusion. Period.
But when I rolloff words of characters… And create this world where "I love" exists,
So deep that it penetrates two realms.
When I can say I have that love inside of me, I know that love completely dissipates,
The struggle it took to get here, and melts it away distant.
And the memory is of one hug. And how one hug can change a life.
And how one person can save your life.
And to come from almost dying to being vibrantly alive again, just from falling in love,
Even if it wasn't real to the other person.
The fire inside that love gave me.
Made me feel amazing and gave me the strength to survive what is ultimately a miraculous healing of my psyche.
So this is a little plain English. And a little poetic abstract.
One person, place, and time, can set in motion events that will forever change another person.
I do love him for that.
We are so in opposite directions, but I don't understand why... were I a monster to him… It was his delusion.
I cannot change the past. I cannot change that I am criminal. And yet I feel it is Gods plan.
For I needed a revolution, within my soul.
And he hand-picked one person, I guess… One person that I alligned with...and the world oddity,
Is that the cause and effect created a bigger picture, than I could have imagined.
If I could stop making it a big deal… Could I be satisfied with what I have now?
If I stop dreaming so big, would I stop feeling about the size of a Mouse, under the shoe of the legal system?
How can I stop every day living or dying?
And I have created a monster of love… That wants to believe in love and understand it.
I don't know what made me write him a book… But I do remember part way through I said I'm looking for someone to understand me, and not run away. I didn't know why it was him??? I didn't know why and that was two years ago. Just a totally weird thing that happened.
And yes now I can feel pain. But I never drink to make it go away… And that's the story of my recovery. I can feel my own pain.
We can save that shit for another platform hey?
I like my dippity dew dah...
Daisies coming up surrounding your cerebrum,
Cell selecting, crazy talking, walking round the pain and soaking,
Up the son shines!
Seriously who needs more pain? Not I?
Who needs more negativity?
If you're gonna suck...go suck somewhere else please!
And if those daisies trip you?
And if your knoggin doesn't want to jive with me?
Is a'ight darlin! Doesn't make you wrong or make me right.
If you can't really relate, why don't we go on a date?
I know I can make you laugh put a smile on your face!
Like sorry mom I don't want to deliberately talk about my pain!
And if you get real real, about what it's like in the society to be a disabled mental person…
If I went there and made my blog about that pain… Yeah it would suck.
So some other day I can write a book about the pain side of this life.
The fear and confusion. Period.
But when I rolloff words of characters… And create this world where "I love" exists,
So deep that it penetrates two realms.
When I can say I have that love inside of me, I know that love completely dissipates,
The struggle it took to get here, and melts it away distant.
And the memory is of one hug. And how one hug can change a life.
And how one person can save your life.
And to come from almost dying to being vibrantly alive again, just from falling in love,
Even if it wasn't real to the other person.
The fire inside that love gave me.
Made me feel amazing and gave me the strength to survive what is ultimately a miraculous healing of my psyche.
So this is a little plain English. And a little poetic abstract.
One person, place, and time, can set in motion events that will forever change another person.
I do love him for that.
We are so in opposite directions, but I don't understand why... were I a monster to him… It was his delusion.
I cannot change the past. I cannot change that I am criminal. And yet I feel it is Gods plan.
For I needed a revolution, within my soul.
And he hand-picked one person, I guess… One person that I alligned with...and the world oddity,
Is that the cause and effect created a bigger picture, than I could have imagined.
If I could stop making it a big deal… Could I be satisfied with what I have now?
If I stop dreaming so big, would I stop feeling about the size of a Mouse, under the shoe of the legal system?
How can I stop every day living or dying?
And I have created a monster of love… That wants to believe in love and understand it.
I don't know what made me write him a book… But I do remember part way through I said I'm looking for someone to understand me, and not run away. I didn't know why it was him??? I didn't know why and that was two years ago. Just a totally weird thing that happened.
And yes now I can feel pain. But I never drink to make it go away… And that's the story of my recovery. I can feel my own pain.
