So here's the deal. I work very hard in sobriety to fight my need for people to like me...I mean I used to need everyone to like me before I knew what to think of myself. Put a hundred people in a room with me and have 99 laughing and nodding to everything I say, and I will concern myself with the one who looked at me funny and immediately go to "I Suck Land." But like I said in sobriety I am much better about this...but.
It's about having so many reads on my posts, and no one liking them! One person likes my posts! I have 75 up to 375 reads on posts and my ego says maybe like at least ten percent of the readers would like to encourage me to continue? Just a little likey? And then sometimes I think my entire blog is messed up because likes will disappear. I don't know but like is just a button you push and its also on Facebook and I shouldn't be so concerned and neigh yet I am human!
So yeah I am trying to be satisfied with my one liker person, you rock whoever you are! Just saying thanks for that. Being popular never got me anywhere. And feeling popular is the worst ego trip I really should have learned to avoid by what happened to me in high school. From the top to the bottom...best to just hang in the middle...
So I will continue to blog as long as I am inspired to do so, whether "everybody" likes me or "nobody" likes me...or maybe just knowing God likes me and inspires me to write is enough. Most prophets are despised and mistolerated you know! Lol!
Of course in a fight with Aunna past few days. I really don't think God has me wired for close friendships. I am tired of even trying. Like I said earlier I don't want to be popular...was told that is just the lot in life for people who are mental, just gonna take some adjusting to this concept of being alone and being superficial with peeps.
Seriously though probably most writers are not social butterflies. And the fact I have written 125 blogs with like one like a piece shows growth and strength in me I have never had. And part of me thinks God messes with my blog to keep all that ego on the level.
It's about having so many reads on my posts, and no one liking them! One person likes my posts! I have 75 up to 375 reads on posts and my ego says maybe like at least ten percent of the readers would like to encourage me to continue? Just a little likey? And then sometimes I think my entire blog is messed up because likes will disappear. I don't know but like is just a button you push and its also on Facebook and I shouldn't be so concerned and neigh yet I am human!
So yeah I am trying to be satisfied with my one liker person, you rock whoever you are! Just saying thanks for that. Being popular never got me anywhere. And feeling popular is the worst ego trip I really should have learned to avoid by what happened to me in high school. From the top to the bottom...best to just hang in the middle...
So I will continue to blog as long as I am inspired to do so, whether "everybody" likes me or "nobody" likes me...or maybe just knowing God likes me and inspires me to write is enough. Most prophets are despised and mistolerated you know! Lol!
Of course in a fight with Aunna past few days. I really don't think God has me wired for close friendships. I am tired of even trying. Like I said earlier I don't want to be popular...was told that is just the lot in life for people who are mental, just gonna take some adjusting to this concept of being alone and being superficial with peeps.
Seriously though probably most writers are not social butterflies. And the fact I have written 125 blogs with like one like a piece shows growth and strength in me I have never had. And part of me thinks God messes with my blog to keep all that ego on the level.
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