OK really strange but my post creepers has about 200 more reads than my other posts. I don't understand why with all the amazing mind blowing shit I have gone through that people find it most intriguing that the infamous lady stalker was being stalked the whole time she is being severely punished for being a texting stalker. I don't believe they have the excuse of having an out of reality experience while they were after me.
It is very difficult to accept two felonies for what I did. After Adam and I broke up in February, over something he didnt like that I was doing, I felt convicted and stopped the next day. I believe that because of what I was doing for a short time and a mistake out of my character, he has never been able to see who I really am, it clouded his vision for sure. So I probably texted him quite a bit and he got upset, so then when my friend Aunna suggested I write him a letter I did that and it was helpful to leave him alone. I wrote to him everyday telling him about my life and the things I was learning in sobriety, so that I would concentrate on my self and not contact him. I figured he just wanted me to work on myself because we both knew I was sick, I did not know he didnt have feelings for me at all until I was way too deep in my love book.
So I was passionately writing Adam and going to meetings and working out like a fiend. In April I tried to stop writing to him because I was feeling obsessed about it, I had written 100 pages in one month! So the two days trying not to write and still thinking about him made me crazy and I left a note on his truck. He called the cops and they gave me a warning. So I was a good girl for another month and continued writing. On May 25 2013...I went to his house and sweetly told him I was in love with him and could we just talk? Let me just tell you why??? No...and he was calling the police. So while he was going to get his phone, I followed him in I tried to persuade him to listen to what I had to say.Then he started yelling at me so I left. He calls this "breaking in." Trust me I am not a midnight recognizance stalker, although that may actually make my high class stalking seem alot more badass, maybe worth a felony even, and I like the idea of tight black clothes, maybe a sexy cat like black mask, and stealth equipment, haha. Somersaulting through his yard with binoculars, totally Mission Impossible he is to me, like he's a movie star...and wouldn't it be the shit if I could tumble? I can do cartwheels!!! YAY! So the day this dude decides he needs to restrain me, he claims I said F U in his yard. Maybe he needs a reality check, because I am not that kind of person...I had called him a fool! As if! "Hey I am really in love with you, and if you say no I am gonna get mad and say F U about it?" His reaction to what I told him terrified me! Was not human really? Very strange...And he claims I was escalating? Yeah I was highly sensitive in that moment, I dont go around telling men I love them, never ever said that!
And he claims I followed him around? Dude is paranoid, my weirdness limit, wouldn't allow me to actually stalk him! And he was so appalled when I went to the same AA meeting where all the young people go? Yep crazy hot chick is in love with you and goes to "your meeting.". OK if you've never been turned on and got butterflies from a guy walking in a room, and try to suppress the need to do it by the coffee pots...then you haven't fully experienced life! So that was me being out of control attracted to a man, and never feeling chemistry before turned my zero hormones to high voltage! Wish I could of been a high school stalker...because feeling butterflies and joy in your stomach for the first time at 34, is dangerous. I went to five meetings a week and he came in at 15 minutes late, and I called those new feelings when he walked in, "getting my flip flop."And boy oh boy it is a feeling you want to happen again! And again...and over and over, because I am an addict and it was by quite far the best feeling of joy I had ever had...what a trip!
So yeah he got a restraining order...court was July 16th. He stood there and said we spent two weeks together and four dinners...yeah dude you took me to dinner once, and I guess you forgot we spent alot of time together in December, and a fairly good amount of sex, you dont say? I had also known him for over a year from meetings. So six weeks and I fall in love him, because to me everything felt just right, well because he made me feel physically safe and yes that was a new feeling to me. So he calls me creepy in the court room. I had never once heard that word to describe me! Like seriously? You wont listen to the magnitude of what happened between us and your just gonna claim I am creepy? Well 8 days later I was creepy.
So do not know what triggers my spirit to crossover. I was marrying Adam in heaven. I had always experienced hell in psychosis...and the heaven story was really much more pleasant! It also made me think my spirit was being healed. So I texted him 7 times when I was like this. There was no concept of the law where I was. Well shit 2 misdemeanors for two texts, and felony stalking for five. I experienced my first jail time as a psycho princess. When I came out of it and realized what I had done to Adam, I fought suicidal thoughts for about month. Its also difficult to process psychosis...no one understands why it happens including doctors. They have no comforting way to explain my random acid trips. You know if I had ever sampled hallucinogens the stuff that happens to me would be less scary? OK and then there was the topless picture in December. I had worked very hard to get toned up, and of course I had to show my motivator. Woops, he was scared for his property from that pic. If he meant his junk...he might have been closer to right! Baby, I was not after your Alan Wrench! I am not that kind of girl. I am not a thief! Okay I admit I had to shoplift clothes in high school to fully represent poor freshman cheerleaders everywhere...but I learned my lesson way back then. So your afraid for your property...maybe I should have come spray painted hearts and kissy lips on his white truck. Bright Pink! Oh it so unnerves me that I am not a real stalker...I did nothing cool. I've never even branded a weapon in my life. I am the biggest loser felony stalker! At least I went insane in sobriety like never before. OK just breathe, your stalker story is amazing just the way it is...you've got to love yourself despite not being able to feel that you can live up to your status...yes Miranda you can do this. REPRESENT!
And that is felony stalking. And I say this in retrospect...but it was probably best that Adam restrained me...not for him but for me. I had alot of work to do and we wouldnt have worked out when I was so sick anyway...all the stuff after the restraining order, well that was a God thing...and I only understand that all now.
It is very difficult to accept two felonies for what I did. After Adam and I broke up in February, over something he didnt like that I was doing, I felt convicted and stopped the next day. I believe that because of what I was doing for a short time and a mistake out of my character, he has never been able to see who I really am, it clouded his vision for sure. So I probably texted him quite a bit and he got upset, so then when my friend Aunna suggested I write him a letter I did that and it was helpful to leave him alone. I wrote to him everyday telling him about my life and the things I was learning in sobriety, so that I would concentrate on my self and not contact him. I figured he just wanted me to work on myself because we both knew I was sick, I did not know he didnt have feelings for me at all until I was way too deep in my love book.
So I was passionately writing Adam and going to meetings and working out like a fiend. In April I tried to stop writing to him because I was feeling obsessed about it, I had written 100 pages in one month! So the two days trying not to write and still thinking about him made me crazy and I left a note on his truck. He called the cops and they gave me a warning. So I was a good girl for another month and continued writing. On May 25 2013...I went to his house and sweetly told him I was in love with him and could we just talk? Let me just tell you why??? No...and he was calling the police. So while he was going to get his phone, I followed him in I tried to persuade him to listen to what I had to say.Then he started yelling at me so I left. He calls this "breaking in." Trust me I am not a midnight recognizance stalker, although that may actually make my high class stalking seem alot more badass, maybe worth a felony even, and I like the idea of tight black clothes, maybe a sexy cat like black mask, and stealth equipment, haha. Somersaulting through his yard with binoculars, totally Mission Impossible he is to me, like he's a movie star...and wouldn't it be the shit if I could tumble? I can do cartwheels!!! YAY! So the day this dude decides he needs to restrain me, he claims I said F U in his yard. Maybe he needs a reality check, because I am not that kind of person...I had called him a fool! As if! "Hey I am really in love with you, and if you say no I am gonna get mad and say F U about it?" His reaction to what I told him terrified me! Was not human really? Very strange...And he claims I was escalating? Yeah I was highly sensitive in that moment, I dont go around telling men I love them, never ever said that!
And he claims I followed him around? Dude is paranoid, my weirdness limit, wouldn't allow me to actually stalk him! And he was so appalled when I went to the same AA meeting where all the young people go? Yep crazy hot chick is in love with you and goes to "your meeting.". OK if you've never been turned on and got butterflies from a guy walking in a room, and try to suppress the need to do it by the coffee pots...then you haven't fully experienced life! So that was me being out of control attracted to a man, and never feeling chemistry before turned my zero hormones to high voltage! Wish I could of been a high school stalker...because feeling butterflies and joy in your stomach for the first time at 34, is dangerous. I went to five meetings a week and he came in at 15 minutes late, and I called those new feelings when he walked in, "getting my flip flop."And boy oh boy it is a feeling you want to happen again! And again...and over and over, because I am an addict and it was by quite far the best feeling of joy I had ever had...what a trip!
So yeah he got a restraining order...court was July 16th. He stood there and said we spent two weeks together and four dinners...yeah dude you took me to dinner once, and I guess you forgot we spent alot of time together in December, and a fairly good amount of sex, you dont say? I had also known him for over a year from meetings. So six weeks and I fall in love him, because to me everything felt just right, well because he made me feel physically safe and yes that was a new feeling to me. So he calls me creepy in the court room. I had never once heard that word to describe me! Like seriously? You wont listen to the magnitude of what happened between us and your just gonna claim I am creepy? Well 8 days later I was creepy.
So do not know what triggers my spirit to crossover. I was marrying Adam in heaven. I had always experienced hell in psychosis...and the heaven story was really much more pleasant! It also made me think my spirit was being healed. So I texted him 7 times when I was like this. There was no concept of the law where I was. Well shit 2 misdemeanors for two texts, and felony stalking for five. I experienced my first jail time as a psycho princess. When I came out of it and realized what I had done to Adam, I fought suicidal thoughts for about month. Its also difficult to process psychosis...no one understands why it happens including doctors. They have no comforting way to explain my random acid trips. You know if I had ever sampled hallucinogens the stuff that happens to me would be less scary? OK and then there was the topless picture in December. I had worked very hard to get toned up, and of course I had to show my motivator. Woops, he was scared for his property from that pic. If he meant his junk...he might have been closer to right! Baby, I was not after your Alan Wrench! I am not that kind of girl. I am not a thief! Okay I admit I had to shoplift clothes in high school to fully represent poor freshman cheerleaders everywhere...but I learned my lesson way back then. So your afraid for your property...maybe I should have come spray painted hearts and kissy lips on his white truck. Bright Pink! Oh it so unnerves me that I am not a real stalker...I did nothing cool. I've never even branded a weapon in my life. I am the biggest loser felony stalker! At least I went insane in sobriety like never before. OK just breathe, your stalker story is amazing just the way it is...you've got to love yourself despite not being able to feel that you can live up to your status...yes Miranda you can do this. REPRESENT!
And that is felony stalking. And I say this in retrospect...but it was probably best that Adam restrained me...not for him but for me. I had alot of work to do and we wouldnt have worked out when I was so sick anyway...all the stuff after the restraining order, well that was a God thing...and I only understand that all now.
